UNIT 6 LESSON 3

TALKING ABOUT IMPOLITE BEHAVIOR

 

In this lesson, you will learn how to talk about different kinds of behavior, some of which may be impolite to you, some of which may not. It's useful to be able to say when you dislike someone's behavior. If you find something really offensive, use expressions like these:

This guy cut in line when we were waiting for movie tickets. It was really offensive.  

His attitude toward women in the office is totally inappropriate.   

For other behavior you might consider impolite but less serious, you can use expressions like these:

 

She's so impolite! She never says 'please' or 'thank you.'

I think it's very rude to pick your nose in public.  

As you study the language in this lesson, think about which kinds of behavior you think are offensive, and which you think are impolite.

CONTRAST CONNECTORS

 

Use contrast connectors to contrast with or contradict something else you say. Use However, to introduce a contrasting sentence.

 

I love parties. However, it's pretty rude to play loud music at 2 a.m.   

It's fine to quickly kiss someone on the cheek. However, making out in public is inappropriate.  

       

Use although to say 'despite the fact.' Even though is a stronger form of although. Notice that both these connectors introduce a contrasting clause.

 

Although it was bad manners to burp after the meal, I couldn't help myself.   

Even though she has purple hair, it's impolite to point at her.

Use in spite of or despite to say 'regardless of.' Notice that they introduce a contrasting noun phrase.

In spite of his offensive behavior, I guess, I'll invite him to the party.

Despite of spitting in the street, I thought they were very polite in general. 

Although, even though, in spite of and despite clauses can also be placed at the end of a sentence.

We started talking to them, even though they cut in line.        

MAN: Hello. Uh, even though I don't know you, I'd like to say something.

WOMAN: Oh. OK. What is it?

MAN: It's kind of embarrassing to say this. However , I noticed you've been staring at me for a while. And I was wondering if there's something wrong.

WOMAN: Oh, my goodness, I'm sorry. That is embarrassing.

MAN: No problem. Uh, is there something wrong?

WOMAN: Well, your hair. It's ... unusual. It's purple.

MAN: Yes, it certainly is.

WOMAN: And, uh, I was just thinking that purple hair is a little shocking, although you're dressed in a suit and tie.

MAN: Oh, don't worry at all about the wild hair. I'm actually completely boring and ordinary.

WOMAN: Really? In spite of your wild hair, you do seem pretty nice.

A kiss on the cheek is okay.

Despite Even However, making out is considered bad manners.

People were very polite, in spite despite spit of the burping.

Although , However, Despite his habit of picking his nose, he's a cute little boy.

In the end, we watched the movie together, even despite however though she cut in front of me in line.

DEALING WITH IMPOLITE BEHAVIOR

When someone is doing something you think is impolite, you may want to ask them to stop. Use expressions like these to politely request that someone change his or her behavior.

I was wondering if you could turn down the music. 

I'd really appreciate it if you could do that somewhere else. 

If you get no result from a polite, indirect request, you may want to take the next step and ask more directly.

Could you please stop doing that? 

Would you mind going to the end of the line?

If a direct question doesn't resolve the issue, you may have to threaten to take action. You can use a conditional sentence to do this.

A: It's a free country. You can't make me go to the end of the line. 

B: I know. But if you do cut, then I'll have to talk to the manager. 

CULTURE NOTE: Although it seems reasonable to complain to someone about their behavior, be careful when and how you do it. Stay polite, no matter how offensive the person becomes, and avoid making threats whenever possible

I slurped up that delicious soup, in spite of his complaints.

Even though she has purple hair, it's impolite to point at her.